Friday, July 25, 2008


I'm starting to wonder if my body has a limited warranty like cars.

Here's my theory:

New cars have warranties that are good for so many miles or so many years.

For the most part, my experience has been that the car runs great until the warranty runs out. Its as though the car has some internal *kill* switch within the computer that tells it when you've exceeded your warranty.


Right then the car begins to break down.

I think the warranty on my body expired on my 35th birthday.

It feels like everything that used to work, decided to start malfunctioning.
Nothing serious, just minor things.

Immune system - I've had more colds this year than I think I've had in the past ten years combined. That's not counting my propensity for bronchitis.

Allergies - I grew up here for goodness sake. Why do I now have allergies??

Gross bodily functions - We all have them, mine just don't work as efficiently as they used to. You don't even want to know!!! It ain't pleasant!

Eyesight - I've worn glasses since I was 5 and had to get new prescriptions each year up until my early 20's. By then things had leveled off and I could go a few years between new glasses. Seems I'm back on the downhill slope again. Sadly I won't be getting new glasses each year. I can't afford spending $400 a year for them.

Back problems - I went 35 years doing the same movement I did last Sunday, but that day was special. That day I pinched a nerve. Highly unrecommended!

Plantar fasciitis - thankfully this lovely little ailment has cleared itself up.

Pimples - Even during the height of puberty, I don't remember having this many zits.

I think it's time to start signing up for the HSA plans my company offers. I have a feeling my health is going to start costing me a bit of money.

Or maybe not. I rarely go to the doctor even if I'm really sick. I'll die at a fairly young age, thus leaving my family no medical bills that need to be paid! LOL

Just kidding!


Naomi said...

I agree except in my case children cause the warranty to expire a couple years earlier.
BOXES PLEASE as many as you can get your arthritic hands on...oh wait you didn't mention that...see you're not completely broken. that'll be next year:)

Bobby the O! said...

Hey, don't feel bad Dallas, mine expired on my 30th birthday! You're right, everything just kinda shut down. Woe is me!